Monday Motivation

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Kill Em Kill Em Kill Em With Kindness ( The Florida Way)

FloridaBryan Stewart, 30, is accused of using the knife — with the word “kindness” written on it — to cut his neighbor after the neighbor came to the home because he was concerned about occupants in the house.

Sounds like someone is a Selena Gomez fan!

I’ll give this to Bryan, he’s a man of his word. He said he’ll kill em with kindness and he made sure he had kindness ready. I give him an A for creativity but a D for follow through.

You know Bryan was walking around his trailer just mumbling as he sharpied onto the knife. Mumbling about how he’ll teach those neighbors a lesson.

Some of this is on the neighbor. You could hear the guy mumbling and talking but you still knocked on the door. Bad bad call dude. Maybe next time just let it be.

Worst Christmas Tree Ever? Worst Christmas Tree Ever.

VirginiaMore than 100 praying mantises hatched from an egg case hidden under the branches of the Christmas tree Springfield resident Molly Kreuze bought for the holiday season. The bugs are moving freely through the house, “crawling on the walls, crawling on the ceilings,” Kreuze told the station, adding that they gravitate toward light. Video taken by WJLA showed the insects hanging from the ceiling and crawling on the windows.

Burn it. Just burn it to the ground now before it’s too late. This is plague punishment for something this lady did and that city needs to act now.

A reasonable person would want to just destroy these monsters.

Instead of vacuuming them up, Kreuze has been using an envelope and shoe box to store the mantises.

Oh well that makes sense. It’s easier to destroy them once they’ve all been captured.

Kreuze has been feeding them fruit flies and is “hoping to re-gift them,” she said.

Nope. Nope. Nope.

Steve Carell Returns To SNL To Rip America’s Heart out

I will go on record as saying I don’t think an The Office reboot needs Carell to work. I like the later seasons despite their flaws and uneven story telling. Give me a new group of characters I’d give it a try. More than anything though I just want to see a good new network comedy. A format that is fast disappearing. More than ever it seems comedies now are just half hour dramas. Give us not what we deserve NBC give us what we want.